
Team Fortress 2
Feb 17, 2016 Kill yourself.
Or maybe that was just my experience.
Oh well.
10/10
Edit: It's been more than eight years since I posted this review, and I wanted to amend the final point. That is not part of the Team Fortress 2 player's cycle. In truth, the cycle is still going, thanks to the dedication of the community.
I will not change my recommendation, because I believe this game will become better again. #SaveTF2
Feb 17, 2016 Kill yourself.
Or maybe that was just my experience.
Oh well.
10/10
Edit: It's been more than eight years since I posted this review, and I wanted to amend the final point. That is not part of the Team Fortress 2 player's cycle. In truth, the cycle is still going, thanks to the dedication of the community.
I will not change my recommendation, because I believe this game will become better again. #SaveTF2
Dec 9, 2014
Dec 13, 2014
May 17, 2015
Oct 26, 2015
Feb 27, 2015 Flash from DC in tf2! (Before Gun Mettle Update)
The Enforcer= Give the finger to them w+m1 pyros (Before Gun Mettle Update)
Phlog= Give the w+m1 to them mercs
Neon annihilator= 2Fort Sharks!
Wrangler= Aimbot
Righteous Bison= "what's dat?"
Weapon stats= "Dunt reed dat, itz uselez"- F2ps 2015
Fat scouts= "pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis!"
Friendlyz= CONGA!
Tryhardz= TRY HARD!
Bugs and glitches= "Welcome to Team Fortress 2. After nine years in development, hopefully it will have been worth the wait."
Updates= BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sanvich= Just a Sanvich bruh..... just a sanvich...
Bonk! Atomic punch! = Red bull.
Trading= "I TROOD 4 GIBUZ!"
Crits= Something you love when you have it but others hate cause they don't have it but you hate it when you don't have it and others love it cause they have it.
Mini crits= The younger brother of crits.
Red-tape recorder= "Haha you have a sentry! now you don't..."
Pybros= "Mhmmhmmhmhmhmmhmhmhhmhm and hmhmhmhmmh."
Crates= Another Money taker!
Aiming down sights = Oi, dis ain't CoD.
Rancho Relaxo = One of the greatest things Valve has ever made.
LMAO.BOX = For suckers, noobs AKA "Cheaters".
The Texas Tech-hand = Another one of the greatest things Valve has ever put into TF2.
The Gun Mettle Update = TF:GO
Nerfs...
RIP Lock-N-Load = 2Op
RIP Gunslinger = 2Troll-ish
RIP Deadringer = 2MuchSkill
RIP Baby Face Blaster = 2Fast4U
RIP Enforcer = 2Op
RIP Powerjack = 2Muselk-ish
RIP Backburner = 2StupidStat- Oh nevermind, It's still the same...
Added...
Kazotsky Kick = Conga 2.0
Box Trot = "Removed due to being too confusing for new players" / Op.
Proletariat Posedown = FIRST... HEAVY... TAUNT... EVER!
Maps = FINALLY... SOME F*CKING MAPS!
The Rest = 85% Shitty Skins and other items to feed Lord Gaben.
And much, MUCH MORE which i can't even sum up!
"11/10 would gabe again"- IGN
But hey.. at the end of the day, it's the good' ol Team Fortress 2 we always love and play :)
Thanks and have fun.
Apr 14, 2015
Oct 4, 2015
Jun 5, 2016
Jan 1, 2015
Aug 5, 2014
Jul 22, 2015
May 24, 2016
Oct 12, 2014
Nov 13, 2016
May 27, 2015
Jan 20, 2015
Aug 23, 2015
May 7, 2015
Oct 17, 2017
Oct 11, 2014
Jun 17, 2016
Oct 9, 2015
Mar 12, 2022

76561198095024798

Recommended912 hrs played (858 hrs at review)
This is the cycle of every Team Fortress 2 player ever:
> Download the game. > Enter your first match. > Realize you don't know what you're doing. > Die repeatedly. > Just before you rage, you find the Ghastly Gibus hat. > Since all the pro players have cool-looking hats, you are inspired. > Die repeatedly in different game modes. > Discover that you are getting a lot of kills as Pyro. > Be mentally violated by other players calling you a "f2p gibus pyro". > Get slightly better at the game. > Die repeatedly. > Leave the game. *6 months later.* > Start to discover TF2 videos on YouTube. > Realize that there are more classes than just Pyro and Sniper. > End up wanting to be a pro non-Pyro like all the cool YouTubers. > Return to Team Fortress 2. > Die repeatedly. > Claim that you 'main' Pyro. > Walk at people and light them on fire mindlessly for a few weeks. Or months. > Start getting a good K/D ratio on a different class. > Succumb to peer-pressure and buy hats. > Discover the Steam community market and buy more hats for less. > Feel your skill strangely growing as you get more hats. > More kills. Less deaths. > You begin to discover the passive players of TF2. (Sandvich hoovies, spycrabs, box shpees, etc.) > Develop a kindness and sense of friendship towards your fellow TF2 players. > Start to top-score more often. > You begin to care about the state of the game. > Realize that Pyros are overpowered and pointless. > Start to hate Pyros. > Start to hate everyone. > Start to hate the TF2 community. > You hate everything and everyone, to the point where you start to kill passive players again. > Ask yourself, "If I hate this game, why do I have ten unusuals and fifteen Australiums? What am I doing?" > Look at your playtime and begin to hate yourself. > You dislike yourself more than the game now. > Contemplate suicide. > Contemplate religion. > Question the game. > Binge-watch STAR_'s 2012-2013 TF2 videos to remind you of a simpler time. > Sit down and think. > Realize what you have become. > Go into a mid-TF2 crisis. > Except it's not mid-TF2 anymore. You have 1000 hours in-game. > What is going on? > WHAT IS TEAM FORTRESS 2? > WHY DOES THE LIGHT LIE TO ME? > Quit TF2 forever. > Come back to it in a week and die to a gibus sniper who taunts after kill. >6699 votes funny
76561198095024798

Recommended912 hrs played (858 hrs at review)
This is the cycle of every Team Fortress 2 player ever:
> Download the game. > Enter your first match. > Realize you don't know what you're doing. > Die repeatedly. > Just before you rage, you find the Ghastly Gibus hat. > Since all the pro players have cool-looking hats, you are inspired. > Die repeatedly in different game modes. > Discover that you are getting a lot of kills as Pyro. > Be mentally violated by other players calling you a "f2p gibus pyro". > Get slightly better at the game. > Die repeatedly. > Leave the game. *6 months later.* > Start to discover TF2 videos on YouTube. > Realize that there are more classes than just Pyro and Sniper. > End up wanting to be a pro non-Pyro like all the cool YouTubers. > Return to Team Fortress 2. > Die repeatedly. > Claim that you 'main' Pyro. > Walk at people and light them on fire mindlessly for a few weeks. Or months. > Start getting a good K/D ratio on a different class. > Succumb to peer-pressure and buy hats. > Discover the Steam community market and buy more hats for less. > Feel your skill strangely growing as you get more hats. > More kills. Less deaths. > You begin to discover the passive players of TF2. (Sandvich hoovies, spycrabs, box shpees, etc.) > Develop a kindness and sense of friendship towards your fellow TF2 players. > Start to top-score more often. > You begin to care about the state of the game. > Realize that Pyros are overpowered and pointless. > Start to hate Pyros. > Start to hate everyone. > Start to hate the TF2 community. > You hate everything and everyone, to the point where you start to kill passive players again. > Ask yourself, "If I hate this game, why do I have ten unusuals and fifteen Australiums? What am I doing?" > Look at your playtime and begin to hate yourself. > You dislike yourself more than the game now. > Contemplate suicide. > Contemplate religion. > Question the game. > Binge-watch STAR_'s 2012-2013 TF2 videos to remind you of a simpler time. > Sit down and think. > Realize what you have become. > Go into a mid-TF2 crisis. > Except it's not mid-TF2 anymore. You have 1000 hours in-game. > What is going on? > WHAT IS TEAM FORTRESS 2? > WHY DOES THE LIGHT LIE TO ME? > Quit TF2 forever. > Come back to it in a week and die to a gibus sniper who taunts after kill. >6699 votes funny
76561198066094995

Recommended6455 hrs played (1891 hrs at review)
Hat IRL = $20
Hat In game = $500
i like
3336 votes funny
76561198085387911

Recommended3761 hrs played (3304 hrs at review)
Can you name any other unmodded AAA First Person Shooter that lets you play as a cocky and fast Bostonian who slaps the hell out of urine-throwing Middle Earth campers with a fresh Atlantic fish wrapped in fine Christmas lights, eat a bucket of fried proccessed poultry over their corpses, and then you get donked on by an exploding cannonball launched from a handheld cannonball launcher held by an African-Celtic(specifically of Scottish descent) cyclopian alcoholic- who can leap yards into the air from his own explosives while weilding a mystic ancient talking ghost claymore and while wearing a purple banana on his head with a peace sign orbiting around it?
I thought so.
3266 votes funny
76561198074605148

Recommended4615 hrs played (1293 hrs at review)
TF2=hats
CoD=no hats
TF2>CoD
3150 votes funny
76561198162907191

Recommended868 hrs played (539 hrs at review)
IQ tests should be mandatory before being able to play MVM.
3016 votes funny
76561198151682758

Recommended1508 hrs played (1131 hrs at review)
TF2 in a nutshell:
Gibus= F2p F2p= Screw Lord Gaben! P2p= Praise Lord Gaben! Unusual= Gods of hats Australium= Gods of weapons Cosmetics= Swag Headshots= Hacker Bodyshots= Noob Facestab= Noob W+m1= Noob Gunslinger engis= Troll Hoovies= "pootis" Scoot= "Neda dispencer her!" Pyro= W+m1 skillz Demoman= Da only black man in da game Engi= Fat funny bastard Snip@rs= "God shave da queen!" Spai= Awesome ( อกยฐ อส อกยฐ) Soldier= "Maggots!" Medic= "Who that? Never heard of it." Team Fortress 2= Hats simulator 2015 Strange= Counts the number of people you have rekt Killstreak= Rekt-um streak Specialized= Oww... Shinyyyyyyyy! Professional= F#cked up eyes Vintage= Old school Taunts= Something that says "Get Shrekt!" after killing someone and/or "Party!" Unusual taunts= Gods of taunts Microphone= "screw 10 yeer olz" / "That guy must be a youtuber!" Sprays= 'Porn' Maps= Battlefield Jarate= Sniper's P!ss Sydney sleeper= P!ss gun Backburner= critz from back, SAME damage but without crits from front. (LOGIC) Baby face blaster=2874 votes funny
76561198045309178

Recommended5286 hrs played (2444 hrs at review)
Want to jump around like an annoying prick who can dodge literally anything that's thrown at him?
Want to use your ammunition to propel yourself across the map at incredibly high speeds and shoot a barrage of high powered rockets in the faces of your enemies?
Want to burn down the homes of those you hate and simultaneously think about unicorns and rainbows?
Want to operate highly explosive bombs and grenades while shouting like a drunk scottish man wielding a medieval sword?
Want to eat sandviches?
Want to carry your team by sticking a life saving device up other people's butts and become the center of attention because everyone either loves or hates your very soul?
Want to build aimbot guns that do all of the work for you while you sit in a chair and drink beer?
Want to be an MLG 360 noscope champion who throws piss at people?
Want to use invisible hacks and kill other players in just one hit by pretending you're one of their friends?
Then play TF2.
10/10 would wear a hat again.
2216 votes funny
76561197974374095

Recommended1202 hrs played (1154 hrs at review)
YAY according to my Mercenary badge, today, October 4 2015, I have been playing TF2 for 5 years and 1,152 hours.
PROS:
-expert at engie and pyro, not bad as spy
CONS:
-still don't know how to play the piano
-haven't mastered a second language
-1,152 hours I was not having sex
2183 votes funny
76561198053831620

Recommended444 hrs played (325 hrs at review)
Few years ago, I asked my friend to play Team Fortress 2. However he said that he doesn't like the game, stating that the game looks cartoonish and he doesn't like its gameplay.
Last week, he asked me to play Overwatch.
2117 votes funny
76561198066507816

Recommended5275 hrs played (1825 hrs at review)
I'm sure I had a social life before...
Doesn't matter, Hats.
1983 votes funny
76561197992385270

Recommended689 hrs played (370 hrs at review)
If you bind forward to a button on your mouse, you can play pyro and eat at the same time
1810 votes funny
76561198060067986

Recommended3481 hrs played (929 hrs at review)
> be me
> be glorious heavy man of the soviet union
> be eating my sandvich
> suddenly blue gibbus spy comes before me and begins to try and taunt kill me
> i move out the way and holiday punch him
> taunt kill him with the fury of gaben at an all you can eat buffet
> dominate him and he calls me a faggot
> tries to get me banned for griefing
> he calls admin
> admin sees nothing wrong
> blue spy calls admin "a p**sy a**ed n***er f****t"
> admin bans him for "abusing the call admin button and for being a b***h"
10 glorious heavies eating sandviches out of 10
1783 votes funny
76561198008426956

Recommended10122 hrs played (4096 hrs at review)
>Tracer doesn't lag anymore and doesn't shoot water guns
> Pharah can now rocket jump
> Mei is finally hot
> Junkrat can explode things twice
> Roadhog killed Bastion and stole his gun
>Tojborn and Symetra have a Texan baby
> Mercy can make things invincible
> Widowmaker and Hanzo are less cancerous
> wow new invisible class
10/10 best Overwatch sequel
1335 votes funny
76561198005572722

Recommended13587 hrs played (12348 hrs at review)
My hours. help.
I wrote something for real!
These hours are legit, I played this game a lot in the past to avoid some tragic stuff in real life. I was young and didn't really have my gaming consoles anymore because of my brothers and I had a really bad pc, which i still own. TF2 was one of the games i could play pretty well on this pc but with horrid graphics, but it was one of the more fun games I installed. I met some real cool and nice people on this game as well as people who i plan to keep by my side. The community back then was more humble compared to nowadays. You have competitive gamers who spam their bind keys with unfunny/gross jokes and very obnoxious people who are either yelling at you or telling you to do specific things to win the game. When really, it doesn't even matter if you win or lose. However, you also have those people who are really awesome and you may meet some nice friends along the way! Although you never know what kinda person you're going to meet on this game. In my honest opinion, if you want to have a game to just waste time on (and money) or just mess around with people you know (which is what I do now), this is perfect. Esspecially the mann vs. machine co-op. I mainly play that now. Although to me, the game lost its touch, update wise, and I moved onto other games.
I believe it's worth a shot to try it out but other than that, I'd keep it as a casual game. I don't think the competitive scene is worth getting into anymore because it's being flooded by crude people. Atleast from my experiance after over about 4+ years of playing it just got worse and worse. You will eventually be tied into drama even if you try to avoid it. You'll be more stressed than actually having fun, I'll tell you that!
Although in all seriousness, this game is losing its touch and probably isn't worth making it your main game MAINLY because the updates they've been releasing are becoming very dull and not as great as they used to be. BUT, it's a great game to just play to pass the time and have fun! All you'll really notice nowdays is...people really love to trade more than actually play. Living off as a free to play would be very tough and you'd need to be patient with items you would want, unless you got that MONEY! Hope this helps.
One last thing, I am not saying this game is bad in any way. I am saying that it's worth trying and playing with friends, or even meeting people! Although there are some downsides that you won't like, such as some stuff I pointed out above. Strictly towards the community. I personally think you should have this game as a side game rather than your come home to play sorta thing. Have it as a once in a while game, because it's nothing to be big about, unless you really do not like most of the millions of other games out there.
Just give it a shot and see what you think! Have fun <3
1280 votes funny
76561198001634629

Recommended101912 hrs played (35732 hrs at review)
After playing this game for 30,000+ hours I would just like to say this game sucks.
1190 votes funny
76561197996502178

Recommended1575 hrs played (1478 hrs at review)
Wallet vacuum 2015 is a unique simulation game where you are given a list of hundreds of 12 year olds' birthday parties with a maximum of 24 guests allowed and you get to pick which one to go to! Remember, don't play well, but pay well as you are given very interesting and informative facts about your mother's social life and the size of your crotch from intellectual children wearing their student loans as digital representations of hats. But hold on there, tiger, there's so much more! This here is a team game with 9 classes. Your team mates will pick very strategic combos such as: pyro, pyro, pyro, pyro, scout, scout, scout, soldier, pyro, demoman, pyro, engineer, pyro, soldier, pyro, and defenitely not medic because why heal when you can squeal (yes, the E button to call for heals). "But why does this matter when I can dance the conga in the spawn?" good question my boy! You don't have to leave the spawn! This is called setting up the Armaments Fun Kamp (also known as the AFK) where you can trade, taunt, and even just join and leave your keyboard to show how much you love using up space on a server. Plus, you too can witness the decorative atmosphere known as "capture points" and "intelligence briefcases" that are placed in very important places on the map for you to stare at, but don't touch! As best said by xXx_W0lF_xXx "Why get the objective when you can get kills?" A modern wiseman he is. You can complete your wallet vacuum experience by opening a "crate o' shit" which is literally $2.49 to ride an emotional rollercoaster which ends in disappointment and a gun that was good the month before you received it. But that's ok! You can make your pathetic peashooter interesting by purchasing a nametag and conjuring up creative nomenclature for it such as "noob punisher" and "looks like ur dead lel Xd". So what are you waiting for? Grab your lighter and all the dollar bills you can find because this is an offer you don't want to miss out on! I definitely didn't play over 1,000 hours of this! I swear! I totally didn't buy any of these hats I'm talking about! I.... I uh... Shit. 11/10 credit card still has scorch marks.
1159 votes funny
76561198078090846

Recommended3047 hrs played (1879 hrs at review)
The vicious cycle of Team fortress 2
First when you'll arrive in the game, you'll want Weapons, tons of them.
Then you'll see that everyone has hats, and you'll want these, a tons of them.
Then you'll realize that hats doesn't matter, only skill count, so you'll want a lot of skills, tons of them.
Then new weapons will be added, and you'll want them, all of them.
Then a new hat will be added and you'll want it, cause it'll be fancy on your main class.
Then you'll realize again, that you don't give a damn about hats, all is about is skill.
Then when you have waited for 3 years, new weapons will be added, and you'll want them.
And then you realize that you spent like 2000 hours of your life for this, met great friends, and you'll have a server where's you feeling like home, and you discovered so much things via the community, it learnt you so much.
Then the rude reality of life, bring you on earth, and this game is here, Waiting for you to play 1,2,3... hours, and you'll be happy to see that all your good friend are still there.
1099 votes funny
76561198001878620

Recommended2136 hrs played (2104 hrs at review)
Apparently this game is about fighting with yourself.
After dominating the opposing team and dying once you will see..
"You're now on the opposing team"
.. and it's only 2 seconds left until the round is over.
943 votes funny
76561198111631620

Recommended1164 hrs played (1067 hrs at review)
I think Jerma summed up this game pretty nicely...
"Maybe you got like two Pyros that just installed the game ten minutes ago. They don't have any hats, they're spraying shit and they're having a blast. They might even be at the wrong point. They might be going backwards to the point that's already been capped.
On the same team, there's a Scout with a Hale's Own Scattergun. He's got 18 kills with a 17 killstreak, he just got 18. He's going 'I just got 18, sick!' He runs up the stairs, he's trying his ass off. He's get *beeping noises* dodging the 'Oh, the sentry almost got me!' He looks up to his left when he gets up the stairs on Gorge and there's two sandwich Heavies having a fucking picnic. So he stops for a second and goes, 'Two... nnnggh!' so he walks forward and gets blown up by a soldier's rocket next door...
...The two sandwich Heavies then decide to move their picnic. There's ants. 'There's ants here, honey. I wanna get out of here.' So they get up, they pack their sandwiches, pack up their lunches, and their breakfast, and whatever the fuck they're eating. They get up and walk toward the door to go to RED because they think, 'That spot near the A point for RED is pretty good.' They walk out the door, and they see four Level 3 Sentry Guns pointing at them. They get shot a million times and blow up, and there's like nine Engineers swinging their wrenches in random directions.
The BLU Scout, at this point, respawns, and walks by the at least 3-4 statues because we all know there's four people AFK when you play this game, you go by the museum of people standing still. He walks out the door and readies his weapon, he's ready, 'I'm going to get another 20 killstreak, just you watch Gaben, I'm going to praise Gaben!' And he goes forward and starts shooting, and he gets backstabbed by a Spy that has been sitting with the Cloak and Dagger in the corner for at least the last 68 seconds."
Normally when I do reviews, I turn into a critic and start to examine that game, pointing out every little flaw and pro and determining a final score. However, Team Fortress 2 (or TF2 for short) helped me make so many memories that if I actually tried to make a fair review on it, it would still be way too biased to consider a valid review.
Team Fortress 2, is, obviously, an amazing game. The teamplay is necessary and going out and attacking solo may be difficult. You need teammates in order to survive and win. The graphics are unique to a shooter game and really makes it a special game.
I'm not here to explain the gameplay or graphics or whatnot.
I love this game because of its charm.
The game has such a unique and diverse cast of characters, you can't help to love all of them at some point. Scout is cocky and overconfident. Spy, another one of the characters in the game, is technically Scout's father. Soldier is a crazed WWII American patriot. He never actually joined the Army, but instead, he had his own personal Nazi killing spree. His roommate was a magician named Merasmus, who grew to hate Soldier. Pyro is mysterious, but portrays the world as one big happy paradise, known as Pyroland. Demoman is a Scottish alcoholic who, due to Merasmus, lost his eye that is now haunted. Heavy, although he appears to be dim-witted, is actually very intelligent and looks over three sisters. Engineer is very intelligent as well, and his grandfather was a major contributor to keeping the war with RED and BLU continue. Medic isn't fond of normal forms of medicine, but is still an important member nonetheless. Sniper is from New Zealand, but was raised in Australia. He prefers working from a distance and his backstory is very similar to Superman's. Spy is the master of disguise, and is technically Scout's father, as said before. Of all the characters, he appears to be the most "mature" and appears to be the ringleader at many times.
Not only that, but the game has an interesting story. I would not like to get too detailed with it. However, it makes little to no sense but is still funny, engaging, and gives TF2 much more depth. There is also a storyline that takes place a few years later where Mann Co. is being attacked, so the mercenaries have to defend it, called Mann vs. Machine. This game mode ties in with the TF comics, which explain many characters' backstories and is currently still in the works as of this review. The other comics (all of which can be found on TF2's official website) are all funny and charming in their own way as well.
The community has been quite debatable on how nice it is at many times, but in the end, it's still an overall great community. I've seen people give out stuff, others mentor some of the newbs (something I do as well) along with much, much more.
Yes. the game is considered a "pay-to-win game" but it isn't necessarily a pay-to-win game. With lots of patience, you will get what you want from the game, whether it be hats, weapons, or whatever it is you want. The game has a learning curve that isn't too steep, but become dedicated and you'll fall in love with it.
No matter how many times you rage to a W+M1 pyro that destroyed your 16 killstreak, or cheer when you unbox an Unusual, or maybe discover a few friends or learn a few things, Team Fortress 2 has been a huge part of my PC gaming life and without it, I probably wouldn't be here today. I cannot recommend this game enough, and I hope that many more memories are made on here.
Valve may be cash cows, but you can't help but admit they are amazing when it comes to making games. Portal, Half-Life 2, Counter-Strike, but this game stands out from the rest to me.
Do I recommend this game? Yes, yes, yes, YES.
912 votes funny
76561198124765834

Recommended9251 hrs played (2947 hrs at review)
To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Team Fortress 2. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewers head. There's also Heavy's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Nicholas Sparks literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about HATS. As a consequence people who dislike Team Fortress 2 truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Spy's existential catchphrase "Hon hon hon!" which itself is a cryptic reference to Sun Tzu's Art of War. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Robin Walker and John Cook's geniuses wit unfold themselves on their television screens. What fools.. how I pity them. ๐
And yes, by the way, i DO have a Team Fortress 2 tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand. Nothin personnel kid ๐
This is why I think it should win lol
i
f
882 votes funny
76561198035814033

Recommended6536 hrs played (2827 hrs at review)
Ruined my life and stole my wallet.
10 out of 10 Hats
825 votes funny
76561198131259592

Recommended1309 hrs played (1026 hrs at review)
Before I played:
๏ผผ๏ผผ ๏ผฟ
ใใ ๏ผผ( อกยฐ อส อกยฐ)
ใใใ <ใโใฝ
ใใใ/ ใ ใธ๏ผผ
ใใ /ใใ/ใ๏ผผ๏ผผ
ใใ ๏พใใใใ ใฝ_ใค
ใใ/ใ/
ใ /ใ/|
ใ(ใ(ใฝ
ใ|ใ|ใ๏ผผ
ใ| ไธฟ ๏ผผ โ)
ใ| |ใใ) /
`ใ )ใใL๏พ
After I played:
๏ผ๏พ๏พ ใใใใใใ ใใ ๏ฝใฝ
/ ใ) ใ๏ผใใฝ
/ ๏ฝใใ( อกยฐ อส อกยฐ๏ผใโ๏ผใ._,ใ
/ใ๏พโ7โใฝใผใใ ๏ผผใ๏ผ
ไธถ๏ผฟ ใ ๏ฝกใใ ใ๏ฝคใ๏ฝก|/
ใใ `ใฝ `ใผ-'_ไบบ`ใผ๏พ
ใใใ ไธถ ๏ฟฃ _ไบบ'ๅฝก)
788 votes funny
76561198122637558

Recommended7467 hrs played (2814 hrs at review)
โโโใ
ค โ ใ
ค โใ
ค โใ
ค โใ
คโโโโโใ
คใ
คโใ
ค โใ
ค โโโโ ใ
โโโใ
คโโโโใ
ค โใ
ค โใ
ค ใ
ค โใ
คใ
คใ
ค โ ใ
ค โใ
ค โ ใ
ค โ ใ
โโโใ
คโ ใ
คโใ
ค โโโโใ
คใ
ค โใ
คใ
ค ใ
ค โโโโใ
ค โโโ ใ
ใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คโโโโใ
คโโโโใ
ค โโโโ
ใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คโโโโใ
คโ ใ
ค โใ
คโ ใ
ค โ
ใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คโใ
ค โใ
คโ ใ
ค โใ
คโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ$โโโโโ$โโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ$โโโโโโโโโ$โโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ$โโโโโโโโโโโโโ$โ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโ
ใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
ค โโโโโใ
คโโโโใ
คโใ
คโโใ
คโโโ
ใ
คใ
ค ใ
คใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
คใ
คโ ใ
คใ
คโโโโใ
คโโโโ ใ
คโโโ
ใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
ค โใ
ค ใ
คโใ
ค โใ
คโใ
คใ
คโใ
คโโโ
โโโโโใ
คโ ใ
ค โใ
ค ใ
คโโโโโ โโโโ โโโโ โโโ โ ใ
ค โใ
คโ
โโโโโใ
คโโโโใ
คใ
ค โโโโโ โ ใ
ค โ โ ใ
ค โ โโโ โโโโใ
คโ
โใ
คใ
ค โใ
คโโโโใ
ค ใ
คโใ
คใ
คโ โโโ โ โ ใ
ค โ โโโ โโโโใ
คโ
773 votes funny
76561198053371044

Recommended1803 hrs played (1636 hrs at review)
โโโโโโโโโโโNo Updates?โโโโโโโโโโโ
โ โฃโขฝโขชโขฃโขฃโขฃโขซโกบโกตโฃโกฎโฃโขทโขฝโขฝโขฝโฃฎโกทโกฝโฃโฃโขฎโขบโฃโขทโขฝโขโกฝโฃ
โ ธโกธโ โ โ โ โขโขโขโขฝโขบโฃชโกณโกโฃโฃโขฏโขโกฟโฃโฃทโฃณโขฏโกทโฃฝโขฝโขฏโฃณโฃซโ
โ โ โขโขโขโขฌโขชโกชโกโฃโกโ โ โ โ โ โ โขโขฏโขซโฃโฃฏโฃฟโฃปโกฝโฃโขโฃโ โ
โ โ ชโกชโกชโฃชโขชโขบโขธโขขโขโขโขคโขโ โ โ โ โ โขโขโกพโฃฟโกฏโฃโขฎโ ทโ โ โ
โ โ โ โ โ โ โกโ โขโขโขโขโขโขโขโขโขโขโขโ โขโฃฝโฃฟโขโ ฒโ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โ โ โกฟโ โ โ โกโขโ โขโฃโ โ โ กโ ฃโกฃโกซโฃโฃฟโ ฏโขชโ ฐโ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โ โกฆโกโกโขโขคโขฃโ ฃโกโฃพโกโ โ โ โกโขฑโฃโฃถโขโขโ โ โ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โ โขโกฒโฃโกฎโกโขโขโขโ โ ขโ โขโขโขตโฃฝโฃฟโกฟโ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โ โ จโฃบโกบโกโกโกฑโกโกโกโก
โกโกโกผโขฝโกปโ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โ โฃผโฃณโฃซโฃพโฃตโฃโกตโกฑโกกโขฃโขโขโขโขโกโ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โฃดโฃฟโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโกฝโกโขโ ชโกขโกฃโฃฃโกโ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โกโกพโฃฟโขฟโขฟโขตโฃฝโฃพโฃผโฃโขธโขธโฃโกโ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โ โ โ โ กโ ฉโกซโขฟโฃโกปโกฎโฃโขฝโ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
756 votes funny
Team Fortress 2
Feb 17, 2016 Kill yourself.
Or maybe that was just my experience.
Oh well.
10/10
Edit: It's been more than eight years since I posted this review, and I wanted to amend the final point. That is not part of the Team Fortress 2 player's cycle. In truth, the cycle is still going, thanks to the dedication of the community.
I will not change my recommendation, because I believe this game will become better again. #SaveTF2
Feb 17, 2016 Kill yourself.
Or maybe that was just my experience.
Oh well.
10/10
Edit: It's been more than eight years since I posted this review, and I wanted to amend the final point. That is not part of the Team Fortress 2 player's cycle. In truth, the cycle is still going, thanks to the dedication of the community.
I will not change my recommendation, because I believe this game will become better again. #SaveTF2
Dec 9, 2014
Dec 13, 2014
May 17, 2015
Oct 26, 2015
Feb 27, 2015 Flash from DC in tf2! (Before Gun Mettle Update)
The Enforcer= Give the finger to them w+m1 pyros (Before Gun Mettle Update)
Phlog= Give the w+m1 to them mercs
Neon annihilator= 2Fort Sharks!
Wrangler= Aimbot
Righteous Bison= "what's dat?"
Weapon stats= "Dunt reed dat, itz uselez"- F2ps 2015
Fat scouts= "pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis! pootis!"
Friendlyz= CONGA!
Tryhardz= TRY HARD!
Bugs and glitches= "Welcome to Team Fortress 2. After nine years in development, hopefully it will have been worth the wait."
Updates= BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!! BONUS DUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sanvich= Just a Sanvich bruh..... just a sanvich...
Bonk! Atomic punch! = Red bull.
Trading= "I TROOD 4 GIBUZ!"
Crits= Something you love when you have it but others hate cause they don't have it but you hate it when you don't have it and others love it cause they have it.
Mini crits= The younger brother of crits.
Red-tape recorder= "Haha you have a sentry! now you don't..."
Pybros= "Mhmmhmmhmhmhmmhmhmhhmhm and hmhmhmhmmh."
Crates= Another Money taker!
Aiming down sights = Oi, dis ain't CoD.
Rancho Relaxo = One of the greatest things Valve has ever made.
LMAO.BOX = For suckers, noobs AKA "Cheaters".
The Texas Tech-hand = Another one of the greatest things Valve has ever put into TF2.
The Gun Mettle Update = TF:GO
Nerfs...
RIP Lock-N-Load = 2Op
RIP Gunslinger = 2Troll-ish
RIP Deadringer = 2MuchSkill
RIP Baby Face Blaster = 2Fast4U
RIP Enforcer = 2Op
RIP Powerjack = 2Muselk-ish
RIP Backburner = 2StupidStat- Oh nevermind, It's still the same...
Added...
Kazotsky Kick = Conga 2.0
Box Trot = "Removed due to being too confusing for new players" / Op.
Proletariat Posedown = FIRST... HEAVY... TAUNT... EVER!
Maps = FINALLY... SOME F*CKING MAPS!
The Rest = 85% Shitty Skins and other items to feed Lord Gaben.
And much, MUCH MORE which i can't even sum up!
"11/10 would gabe again"- IGN
But hey.. at the end of the day, it's the good' ol Team Fortress 2 we always love and play :)
Thanks and have fun.
Apr 14, 2015
Oct 4, 2015
Jun 5, 2016
Jan 1, 2015
Aug 5, 2014
Jul 22, 2015
May 24, 2016
Oct 12, 2014
Nov 13, 2016
May 27, 2015
Jan 20, 2015
Aug 23, 2015
May 7, 2015
Oct 17, 2017
Oct 11, 2014
Jun 17, 2016
Oct 9, 2015
Mar 12, 2022

76561198095024798

Recommended912 hrs played (858 hrs at review)
This is the cycle of every Team Fortress 2 player ever:
> Download the game. > Enter your first match. > Realize you don't know what you're doing. > Die repeatedly. > Just before you rage, you find the Ghastly Gibus hat. > Since all the pro players have cool-looking hats, you are inspired. > Die repeatedly in different game modes. > Discover that you are getting a lot of kills as Pyro. > Be mentally violated by other players calling you a "f2p gibus pyro". > Get slightly better at the game. > Die repeatedly. > Leave the game. *6 months later.* > Start to discover TF2 videos on YouTube. > Realize that there are more classes than just Pyro and Sniper. > End up wanting to be a pro non-Pyro like all the cool YouTubers. > Return to Team Fortress 2. > Die repeatedly. > Claim that you 'main' Pyro. > Walk at people and light them on fire mindlessly for a few weeks. Or months. > Start getting a good K/D ratio on a different class. > Succumb to peer-pressure and buy hats. > Discover the Steam community market and buy more hats for less. > Feel your skill strangely growing as you get more hats. > More kills. Less deaths. > You begin to discover the passive players of TF2. (Sandvich hoovies, spycrabs, box shpees, etc.) > Develop a kindness and sense of friendship towards your fellow TF2 players. > Start to top-score more often. > You begin to care about the state of the game. > Realize that Pyros are overpowered and pointless. > Start to hate Pyros. > Start to hate everyone. > Start to hate the TF2 community. > You hate everything and everyone, to the point where you start to kill passive players again. > Ask yourself, "If I hate this game, why do I have ten unusuals and fifteen Australiums? What am I doing?" > Look at your playtime and begin to hate yourself. > You dislike yourself more than the game now. > Contemplate suicide. > Contemplate religion. > Question the game. > Binge-watch STAR_'s 2012-2013 TF2 videos to remind you of a simpler time. > Sit down and think. > Realize what you have become. > Go into a mid-TF2 crisis. > Except it's not mid-TF2 anymore. You have 1000 hours in-game. > What is going on? > WHAT IS TEAM FORTRESS 2? > WHY DOES THE LIGHT LIE TO ME? > Quit TF2 forever. > Come back to it in a week and die to a gibus sniper who taunts after kill. >6699 votes funny
76561198095024798

Recommended912 hrs played (858 hrs at review)
This is the cycle of every Team Fortress 2 player ever:
> Download the game. > Enter your first match. > Realize you don't know what you're doing. > Die repeatedly. > Just before you rage, you find the Ghastly Gibus hat. > Since all the pro players have cool-looking hats, you are inspired. > Die repeatedly in different game modes. > Discover that you are getting a lot of kills as Pyro. > Be mentally violated by other players calling you a "f2p gibus pyro". > Get slightly better at the game. > Die repeatedly. > Leave the game. *6 months later.* > Start to discover TF2 videos on YouTube. > Realize that there are more classes than just Pyro and Sniper. > End up wanting to be a pro non-Pyro like all the cool YouTubers. > Return to Team Fortress 2. > Die repeatedly. > Claim that you 'main' Pyro. > Walk at people and light them on fire mindlessly for a few weeks. Or months. > Start getting a good K/D ratio on a different class. > Succumb to peer-pressure and buy hats. > Discover the Steam community market and buy more hats for less. > Feel your skill strangely growing as you get more hats. > More kills. Less deaths. > You begin to discover the passive players of TF2. (Sandvich hoovies, spycrabs, box shpees, etc.) > Develop a kindness and sense of friendship towards your fellow TF2 players. > Start to top-score more often. > You begin to care about the state of the game. > Realize that Pyros are overpowered and pointless. > Start to hate Pyros. > Start to hate everyone. > Start to hate the TF2 community. > You hate everything and everyone, to the point where you start to kill passive players again. > Ask yourself, "If I hate this game, why do I have ten unusuals and fifteen Australiums? What am I doing?" > Look at your playtime and begin to hate yourself. > You dislike yourself more than the game now. > Contemplate suicide. > Contemplate religion. > Question the game. > Binge-watch STAR_'s 2012-2013 TF2 videos to remind you of a simpler time. > Sit down and think. > Realize what you have become. > Go into a mid-TF2 crisis. > Except it's not mid-TF2 anymore. You have 1000 hours in-game. > What is going on? > WHAT IS TEAM FORTRESS 2? > WHY DOES THE LIGHT LIE TO ME? > Quit TF2 forever. > Come back to it in a week and die to a gibus sniper who taunts after kill. >6699 votes funny
76561198066094995

Recommended6455 hrs played (1891 hrs at review)
Hat IRL = $20
Hat In game = $500
i like
3336 votes funny
76561198085387911

Recommended3761 hrs played (3304 hrs at review)
Can you name any other unmodded AAA First Person Shooter that lets you play as a cocky and fast Bostonian who slaps the hell out of urine-throwing Middle Earth campers with a fresh Atlantic fish wrapped in fine Christmas lights, eat a bucket of fried proccessed poultry over their corpses, and then you get donked on by an exploding cannonball launched from a handheld cannonball launcher held by an African-Celtic(specifically of Scottish descent) cyclopian alcoholic- who can leap yards into the air from his own explosives while weilding a mystic ancient talking ghost claymore and while wearing a purple banana on his head with a peace sign orbiting around it?
I thought so.
3266 votes funny
76561198074605148

Recommended4615 hrs played (1293 hrs at review)
TF2=hats
CoD=no hats
TF2>CoD
3150 votes funny
76561198162907191

Recommended868 hrs played (539 hrs at review)
IQ tests should be mandatory before being able to play MVM.
3016 votes funny
76561198151682758

Recommended1508 hrs played (1131 hrs at review)
TF2 in a nutshell:
Gibus= F2p F2p= Screw Lord Gaben! P2p= Praise Lord Gaben! Unusual= Gods of hats Australium= Gods of weapons Cosmetics= Swag Headshots= Hacker Bodyshots= Noob Facestab= Noob W+m1= Noob Gunslinger engis= Troll Hoovies= "pootis" Scoot= "Neda dispencer her!" Pyro= W+m1 skillz Demoman= Da only black man in da game Engi= Fat funny bastard Snip@rs= "God shave da queen!" Spai= Awesome ( อกยฐ อส อกยฐ) Soldier= "Maggots!" Medic= "Who that? Never heard of it." Team Fortress 2= Hats simulator 2015 Strange= Counts the number of people you have rekt Killstreak= Rekt-um streak Specialized= Oww... Shinyyyyyyyy! Professional= F#cked up eyes Vintage= Old school Taunts= Something that says "Get Shrekt!" after killing someone and/or "Party!" Unusual taunts= Gods of taunts Microphone= "screw 10 yeer olz" / "That guy must be a youtuber!" Sprays= 'Porn' Maps= Battlefield Jarate= Sniper's P!ss Sydney sleeper= P!ss gun Backburner= critz from back, SAME damage but without crits from front. (LOGIC) Baby face blaster=2874 votes funny
76561198045309178

Recommended5286 hrs played (2444 hrs at review)
Want to jump around like an annoying prick who can dodge literally anything that's thrown at him?
Want to use your ammunition to propel yourself across the map at incredibly high speeds and shoot a barrage of high powered rockets in the faces of your enemies?
Want to burn down the homes of those you hate and simultaneously think about unicorns and rainbows?
Want to operate highly explosive bombs and grenades while shouting like a drunk scottish man wielding a medieval sword?
Want to eat sandviches?
Want to carry your team by sticking a life saving device up other people's butts and become the center of attention because everyone either loves or hates your very soul?
Want to build aimbot guns that do all of the work for you while you sit in a chair and drink beer?
Want to be an MLG 360 noscope champion who throws piss at people?
Want to use invisible hacks and kill other players in just one hit by pretending you're one of their friends?
Then play TF2.
10/10 would wear a hat again.
2216 votes funny
76561197974374095

Recommended1202 hrs played (1154 hrs at review)
YAY according to my Mercenary badge, today, October 4 2015, I have been playing TF2 for 5 years and 1,152 hours.
PROS:
-expert at engie and pyro, not bad as spy
CONS:
-still don't know how to play the piano
-haven't mastered a second language
-1,152 hours I was not having sex
2183 votes funny
76561198053831620

Recommended444 hrs played (325 hrs at review)
Few years ago, I asked my friend to play Team Fortress 2. However he said that he doesn't like the game, stating that the game looks cartoonish and he doesn't like its gameplay.
Last week, he asked me to play Overwatch.
2117 votes funny
76561198066507816

Recommended5275 hrs played (1825 hrs at review)
I'm sure I had a social life before...
Doesn't matter, Hats.
1983 votes funny
76561197992385270

Recommended689 hrs played (370 hrs at review)
If you bind forward to a button on your mouse, you can play pyro and eat at the same time
1810 votes funny
76561198060067986

Recommended3481 hrs played (929 hrs at review)
> be me
> be glorious heavy man of the soviet union
> be eating my sandvich
> suddenly blue gibbus spy comes before me and begins to try and taunt kill me
> i move out the way and holiday punch him
> taunt kill him with the fury of gaben at an all you can eat buffet
> dominate him and he calls me a faggot
> tries to get me banned for griefing
> he calls admin
> admin sees nothing wrong
> blue spy calls admin "a p**sy a**ed n***er f****t"
> admin bans him for "abusing the call admin button and for being a b***h"
10 glorious heavies eating sandviches out of 10
1783 votes funny
76561198008426956

Recommended10122 hrs played (4096 hrs at review)
>Tracer doesn't lag anymore and doesn't shoot water guns
> Pharah can now rocket jump
> Mei is finally hot
> Junkrat can explode things twice
> Roadhog killed Bastion and stole his gun
>Tojborn and Symetra have a Texan baby
> Mercy can make things invincible
> Widowmaker and Hanzo are less cancerous
> wow new invisible class
10/10 best Overwatch sequel
1335 votes funny
76561198005572722

Recommended13587 hrs played (12348 hrs at review)
My hours. help.
I wrote something for real!
These hours are legit, I played this game a lot in the past to avoid some tragic stuff in real life. I was young and didn't really have my gaming consoles anymore because of my brothers and I had a really bad pc, which i still own. TF2 was one of the games i could play pretty well on this pc but with horrid graphics, but it was one of the more fun games I installed. I met some real cool and nice people on this game as well as people who i plan to keep by my side. The community back then was more humble compared to nowadays. You have competitive gamers who spam their bind keys with unfunny/gross jokes and very obnoxious people who are either yelling at you or telling you to do specific things to win the game. When really, it doesn't even matter if you win or lose. However, you also have those people who are really awesome and you may meet some nice friends along the way! Although you never know what kinda person you're going to meet on this game. In my honest opinion, if you want to have a game to just waste time on (and money) or just mess around with people you know (which is what I do now), this is perfect. Esspecially the mann vs. machine co-op. I mainly play that now. Although to me, the game lost its touch, update wise, and I moved onto other games.
I believe it's worth a shot to try it out but other than that, I'd keep it as a casual game. I don't think the competitive scene is worth getting into anymore because it's being flooded by crude people. Atleast from my experiance after over about 4+ years of playing it just got worse and worse. You will eventually be tied into drama even if you try to avoid it. You'll be more stressed than actually having fun, I'll tell you that!
Although in all seriousness, this game is losing its touch and probably isn't worth making it your main game MAINLY because the updates they've been releasing are becoming very dull and not as great as they used to be. BUT, it's a great game to just play to pass the time and have fun! All you'll really notice nowdays is...people really love to trade more than actually play. Living off as a free to play would be very tough and you'd need to be patient with items you would want, unless you got that MONEY! Hope this helps.
One last thing, I am not saying this game is bad in any way. I am saying that it's worth trying and playing with friends, or even meeting people! Although there are some downsides that you won't like, such as some stuff I pointed out above. Strictly towards the community. I personally think you should have this game as a side game rather than your come home to play sorta thing. Have it as a once in a while game, because it's nothing to be big about, unless you really do not like most of the millions of other games out there.
Just give it a shot and see what you think! Have fun <3
1280 votes funny
76561198001634629

Recommended101912 hrs played (35732 hrs at review)
After playing this game for 30,000+ hours I would just like to say this game sucks.
1190 votes funny
76561197996502178

Recommended1575 hrs played (1478 hrs at review)
Wallet vacuum 2015 is a unique simulation game where you are given a list of hundreds of 12 year olds' birthday parties with a maximum of 24 guests allowed and you get to pick which one to go to! Remember, don't play well, but pay well as you are given very interesting and informative facts about your mother's social life and the size of your crotch from intellectual children wearing their student loans as digital representations of hats. But hold on there, tiger, there's so much more! This here is a team game with 9 classes. Your team mates will pick very strategic combos such as: pyro, pyro, pyro, pyro, scout, scout, scout, soldier, pyro, demoman, pyro, engineer, pyro, soldier, pyro, and defenitely not medic because why heal when you can squeal (yes, the E button to call for heals). "But why does this matter when I can dance the conga in the spawn?" good question my boy! You don't have to leave the spawn! This is called setting up the Armaments Fun Kamp (also known as the AFK) where you can trade, taunt, and even just join and leave your keyboard to show how much you love using up space on a server. Plus, you too can witness the decorative atmosphere known as "capture points" and "intelligence briefcases" that are placed in very important places on the map for you to stare at, but don't touch! As best said by xXx_W0lF_xXx "Why get the objective when you can get kills?" A modern wiseman he is. You can complete your wallet vacuum experience by opening a "crate o' shit" which is literally $2.49 to ride an emotional rollercoaster which ends in disappointment and a gun that was good the month before you received it. But that's ok! You can make your pathetic peashooter interesting by purchasing a nametag and conjuring up creative nomenclature for it such as "noob punisher" and "looks like ur dead lel Xd". So what are you waiting for? Grab your lighter and all the dollar bills you can find because this is an offer you don't want to miss out on! I definitely didn't play over 1,000 hours of this! I swear! I totally didn't buy any of these hats I'm talking about! I.... I uh... Shit. 11/10 credit card still has scorch marks.
1159 votes funny
76561198078090846

Recommended3047 hrs played (1879 hrs at review)
The vicious cycle of Team fortress 2
First when you'll arrive in the game, you'll want Weapons, tons of them.
Then you'll see that everyone has hats, and you'll want these, a tons of them.
Then you'll realize that hats doesn't matter, only skill count, so you'll want a lot of skills, tons of them.
Then new weapons will be added, and you'll want them, all of them.
Then a new hat will be added and you'll want it, cause it'll be fancy on your main class.
Then you'll realize again, that you don't give a damn about hats, all is about is skill.
Then when you have waited for 3 years, new weapons will be added, and you'll want them.
And then you realize that you spent like 2000 hours of your life for this, met great friends, and you'll have a server where's you feeling like home, and you discovered so much things via the community, it learnt you so much.
Then the rude reality of life, bring you on earth, and this game is here, Waiting for you to play 1,2,3... hours, and you'll be happy to see that all your good friend are still there.
1099 votes funny
76561198001878620

Recommended2136 hrs played (2104 hrs at review)
Apparently this game is about fighting with yourself.
After dominating the opposing team and dying once you will see..
"You're now on the opposing team"
.. and it's only 2 seconds left until the round is over.
943 votes funny
76561198111631620

Recommended1164 hrs played (1067 hrs at review)
I think Jerma summed up this game pretty nicely...
"Maybe you got like two Pyros that just installed the game ten minutes ago. They don't have any hats, they're spraying shit and they're having a blast. They might even be at the wrong point. They might be going backwards to the point that's already been capped.
On the same team, there's a Scout with a Hale's Own Scattergun. He's got 18 kills with a 17 killstreak, he just got 18. He's going 'I just got 18, sick!' He runs up the stairs, he's trying his ass off. He's get *beeping noises* dodging the 'Oh, the sentry almost got me!' He looks up to his left when he gets up the stairs on Gorge and there's two sandwich Heavies having a fucking picnic. So he stops for a second and goes, 'Two... nnnggh!' so he walks forward and gets blown up by a soldier's rocket next door...
...The two sandwich Heavies then decide to move their picnic. There's ants. 'There's ants here, honey. I wanna get out of here.' So they get up, they pack their sandwiches, pack up their lunches, and their breakfast, and whatever the fuck they're eating. They get up and walk toward the door to go to RED because they think, 'That spot near the A point for RED is pretty good.' They walk out the door, and they see four Level 3 Sentry Guns pointing at them. They get shot a million times and blow up, and there's like nine Engineers swinging their wrenches in random directions.
The BLU Scout, at this point, respawns, and walks by the at least 3-4 statues because we all know there's four people AFK when you play this game, you go by the museum of people standing still. He walks out the door and readies his weapon, he's ready, 'I'm going to get another 20 killstreak, just you watch Gaben, I'm going to praise Gaben!' And he goes forward and starts shooting, and he gets backstabbed by a Spy that has been sitting with the Cloak and Dagger in the corner for at least the last 68 seconds."
Normally when I do reviews, I turn into a critic and start to examine that game, pointing out every little flaw and pro and determining a final score. However, Team Fortress 2 (or TF2 for short) helped me make so many memories that if I actually tried to make a fair review on it, it would still be way too biased to consider a valid review.
Team Fortress 2, is, obviously, an amazing game. The teamplay is necessary and going out and attacking solo may be difficult. You need teammates in order to survive and win. The graphics are unique to a shooter game and really makes it a special game.
I'm not here to explain the gameplay or graphics or whatnot.
I love this game because of its charm.
The game has such a unique and diverse cast of characters, you can't help to love all of them at some point. Scout is cocky and overconfident. Spy, another one of the characters in the game, is technically Scout's father. Soldier is a crazed WWII American patriot. He never actually joined the Army, but instead, he had his own personal Nazi killing spree. His roommate was a magician named Merasmus, who grew to hate Soldier. Pyro is mysterious, but portrays the world as one big happy paradise, known as Pyroland. Demoman is a Scottish alcoholic who, due to Merasmus, lost his eye that is now haunted. Heavy, although he appears to be dim-witted, is actually very intelligent and looks over three sisters. Engineer is very intelligent as well, and his grandfather was a major contributor to keeping the war with RED and BLU continue. Medic isn't fond of normal forms of medicine, but is still an important member nonetheless. Sniper is from New Zealand, but was raised in Australia. He prefers working from a distance and his backstory is very similar to Superman's. Spy is the master of disguise, and is technically Scout's father, as said before. Of all the characters, he appears to be the most "mature" and appears to be the ringleader at many times.
Not only that, but the game has an interesting story. I would not like to get too detailed with it. However, it makes little to no sense but is still funny, engaging, and gives TF2 much more depth. There is also a storyline that takes place a few years later where Mann Co. is being attacked, so the mercenaries have to defend it, called Mann vs. Machine. This game mode ties in with the TF comics, which explain many characters' backstories and is currently still in the works as of this review. The other comics (all of which can be found on TF2's official website) are all funny and charming in their own way as well.
The community has been quite debatable on how nice it is at many times, but in the end, it's still an overall great community. I've seen people give out stuff, others mentor some of the newbs (something I do as well) along with much, much more.
Yes. the game is considered a "pay-to-win game" but it isn't necessarily a pay-to-win game. With lots of patience, you will get what you want from the game, whether it be hats, weapons, or whatever it is you want. The game has a learning curve that isn't too steep, but become dedicated and you'll fall in love with it.
No matter how many times you rage to a W+M1 pyro that destroyed your 16 killstreak, or cheer when you unbox an Unusual, or maybe discover a few friends or learn a few things, Team Fortress 2 has been a huge part of my PC gaming life and without it, I probably wouldn't be here today. I cannot recommend this game enough, and I hope that many more memories are made on here.
Valve may be cash cows, but you can't help but admit they are amazing when it comes to making games. Portal, Half-Life 2, Counter-Strike, but this game stands out from the rest to me.
Do I recommend this game? Yes, yes, yes, YES.
912 votes funny
76561198124765834

Recommended9251 hrs played (2947 hrs at review)
To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Team Fortress 2. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewers head. There's also Heavy's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Nicholas Sparks literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about HATS. As a consequence people who dislike Team Fortress 2 truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Spy's existential catchphrase "Hon hon hon!" which itself is a cryptic reference to Sun Tzu's Art of War. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Robin Walker and John Cook's geniuses wit unfold themselves on their television screens. What fools.. how I pity them. ๐
And yes, by the way, i DO have a Team Fortress 2 tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand. Nothin personnel kid ๐
This is why I think it should win lol
i
f
882 votes funny
76561198035814033

Recommended6536 hrs played (2827 hrs at review)
Ruined my life and stole my wallet.
10 out of 10 Hats
825 votes funny
76561198131259592

Recommended1309 hrs played (1026 hrs at review)
Before I played:
๏ผผ๏ผผ ๏ผฟ
ใใ ๏ผผ( อกยฐ อส อกยฐ)
ใใใ <ใโใฝ
ใใใ/ ใ ใธ๏ผผ
ใใ /ใใ/ใ๏ผผ๏ผผ
ใใ ๏พใใใใ ใฝ_ใค
ใใ/ใ/
ใ /ใ/|
ใ(ใ(ใฝ
ใ|ใ|ใ๏ผผ
ใ| ไธฟ ๏ผผ โ)
ใ| |ใใ) /
`ใ )ใใL๏พ
After I played:
๏ผ๏พ๏พ ใใใใใใ ใใ ๏ฝใฝ
/ ใ) ใ๏ผใใฝ
/ ๏ฝใใ( อกยฐ อส อกยฐ๏ผใโ๏ผใ._,ใ
/ใ๏พโ7โใฝใผใใ ๏ผผใ๏ผ
ไธถ๏ผฟ ใ ๏ฝกใใ ใ๏ฝคใ๏ฝก|/
ใใ `ใฝ `ใผ-'_ไบบ`ใผ๏พ
ใใใ ไธถ ๏ฟฃ _ไบบ'ๅฝก)
788 votes funny
76561198122637558

Recommended7467 hrs played (2814 hrs at review)
โโโใ
ค โ ใ
ค โใ
ค โใ
ค โใ
คโโโโโใ
คใ
คโใ
ค โใ
ค โโโโ ใ
โโโใ
คโโโโใ
ค โใ
ค โใ
ค ใ
ค โใ
คใ
คใ
ค โ ใ
ค โใ
ค โ ใ
ค โ ใ
โโโใ
คโ ใ
คโใ
ค โโโโใ
คใ
ค โใ
คใ
ค ใ
ค โโโโใ
ค โโโ ใ
ใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คโโโโใ
คโโโโใ
ค โโโโ
ใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คโโโโใ
คโ ใ
ค โใ
คโ ใ
ค โ
ใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คใ
คโใ
ค โใ
คโ ใ
ค โใ
คโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ$โโโโโ$โโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ$โโโโโโโโโ$โโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ$โโโโโโโโโโโโโ$โ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโโ
โโโโโโโโโ
ใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
ค โโโโโใ
คโโโโใ
คโใ
คโโใ
คโโโ
ใ
คใ
ค ใ
คใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
คใ
คโ ใ
คใ
คโโโโใ
คโโโโ ใ
คโโโ
ใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
ค ใ
ค โใ
ค ใ
คโใ
ค โใ
คโใ
คใ
คโใ
คโโโ
โโโโโใ
คโ ใ
ค โใ
ค ใ
คโโโโโ โโโโ โโโโ โโโ โ ใ
ค โใ
คโ
โโโโโใ
คโโโโใ
คใ
ค โโโโโ โ ใ
ค โ โ ใ
ค โ โโโ โโโโใ
คโ
โใ
คใ
ค โใ
คโโโโใ
ค ใ
คโใ
คใ
คโ โโโ โ โ ใ
ค โ โโโ โโโโใ
คโ
773 votes funny
76561198053371044

Recommended1803 hrs played (1636 hrs at review)
โโโโโโโโโโโNo Updates?โโโโโโโโโโโ
โ โฃโขฝโขชโขฃโขฃโขฃโขซโกบโกตโฃโกฎโฃโขทโขฝโขฝโขฝโฃฎโกทโกฝโฃโฃโขฎโขบโฃโขทโขฝโขโกฝโฃ
โ ธโกธโ โ โ โ โขโขโขโขฝโขบโฃชโกณโกโฃโฃโขฏโขโกฟโฃโฃทโฃณโขฏโกทโฃฝโขฝโขฏโฃณโฃซโ
โ โ โขโขโขโขฌโขชโกชโกโฃโกโ โ โ โ โ โ โขโขฏโขซโฃโฃฏโฃฟโฃปโกฝโฃโขโฃโ โ
โ โ ชโกชโกชโฃชโขชโขบโขธโขขโขโขโขคโขโ โ โ โ โ โขโขโกพโฃฟโกฏโฃโขฎโ ทโ โ โ
โ โ โ โ โ โ โกโ โขโขโขโขโขโขโขโขโขโขโขโ โขโฃฝโฃฟโขโ ฒโ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โ โ โกฟโ โ โ โกโขโ โขโฃโ โ โ กโ ฃโกฃโกซโฃโฃฟโ ฏโขชโ ฐโ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โ โกฆโกโกโขโขคโขฃโ ฃโกโฃพโกโ โ โ โกโขฑโฃโฃถโขโขโ โ โ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โ โขโกฒโฃโกฎโกโขโขโขโ โ ขโ โขโขโขตโฃฝโฃฟโกฟโ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โ โ จโฃบโกบโกโกโกฑโกโกโกโก
โกโกโกผโขฝโกปโ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โ โฃผโฃณโฃซโฃพโฃตโฃโกตโกฑโกกโขฃโขโขโขโขโกโ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โฃดโฃฟโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโกฝโกโขโ ชโกขโกฃโฃฃโกโ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โกโกพโฃฟโขฟโขฟโขตโฃฝโฃพโฃผโฃโขธโขธโฃโกโ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ
โ โ โ โ โ โ โ กโ ฉโกซโขฟโฃโกปโกฎโฃโขฝโ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
756 votes funny